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Sunday, July 27, 2014

Not Waving - Drowning...

I come from a long line of "over committers". Any job that needs doing we are first in line to volunteer but I thought, after intensive self therapy, I was learning to say "NO" with aplomb and dignity.

Until I woke up this morning in a cold sweat and realised there were simply not enough hours in the day - unless I gave up sleep - to get through my to do list. 

 My DH (darling husband) has been working interstate for the last few months leaving me at home alone. A bit like an excited teenager I have spread myself throughout the house, with plans for all the things I could do in his absence (I have been married 30 years so this was a bit like that proverbial “time off for good behaviour"). Without the distraction of a 3rd party (I don’t count the cats although they can be seriously demanding), I have realised that my life is spiralling out of control.

I work 2 days a week so that still leaves 5 days… and on those days I rise by 6.30am and I am in bed by 10.30pm. So how am I filling my time? 

I am a compulsive list writer and by my calculation this is my do to list FOR THIS WEEK:
  • Hard core revisions for a writing project that I can’t tell you about yet! This is taking an inordinate amount of time. I can’t write fast and layering my books is like handcrafting an objet d’art. Even revisions require care and attention to make sure all the pieces fit together.
  •  A general panic because my next book is due in February and I have only a few sketchy scenes and I have never written to a deadline before and have I mentioned I am a very slow writer?
  • Judging a writing contest. It’s my “giving back” to the writing community but again it takes time and thought.
  • Real Life - electricians to chase up, tax to be done, bills to be paid and the Parish Newsletter of which I am editor, Parish Council responsibilities, meetings of the Charity Board of which I am Secretary to co-ordinate.
  •  Research blogs for the two group blogs I am a part of. These take hours to research and write.
  • Needlework… This was not a good time to start a new quilt, but it is for a friend’s birthday and then there is the cross stitch project I have to finish by a certain date too. Needlework and writing are incompatible hobbies.
  •  Did I mention diet and exercise?

And then there is the “business” side of being a writer at which I have decided I am a complete failure. My own blogging is erratic, let alone writing blogs for other blogs and I am now convinced I am a social media fail. I have a Facebook profile, a Facebook Page, a Twitter account and a Pinterest Board and that is ENOUGH! As it is I don’t think I have Twitter worked out at all and I use FB as my own social hang out with my other writer pals. I don't have time to watch the wonderful webinars about how to make social media work for you...

Throw in the fact that over June and July my book sales stopped dead. I don’t mean slowed or dropped, I mean just stopped in the water. What? Why? Is it the northern hemisphere summer or is it me? Why am I doing all of this if no one wants to buy my books? 

So like Chicken Little I am running around and around in ever decreasing circles and I have just spent half an hour writing a blog no one will read because my blogging is too irregular to have garnered an audience.... 

My husband comes home this week and he is going to find a gibbering idiot sitting at the kitchen table frozen into inaction by too much action...

PS I forgot to mention CLAIMING THE REBEL'S HEART is currently available at a promotion price of .99c at all good estores.